Match Review: Hibernians FC vs Gaelic Lions FC

• DF Jamie Barnes
• MD Julio Vasquez
• -- Andrew Talbot
• -- Adam Parker
• -- Chris Boylen
• -- Alex Titmarsh
• -- Clement Chamette
• -- Roger Milburn
• -- Andrew Knott
• -- Tom Hawker
• -- Luke Liperis

• -- Andy Clark
• -- Paul Marshall
• -- Mark O'Halloran

Sorry Start

'Some other lads nobody knows' did not do anything to make themselves more memorable on the opening day as Gaelic cruised to a 0-5 win. Gaelic scored their first goal with a stood up cross that played to the strengths of their tall front man and headed powerfully past Tommy in goal. The second to fifth goals were criminal to concede. A combination of disjointed covering and sluggishness afforded the lively Gaelic wingers all the encouragement they needed and they took full advantage. Hibs barely threatened the Lions goal, but for a shoulder from Talbot and a good effort from Julio that was just too high. The home side were much more competitive in the second half, but the Lions had backed off a bit. Gaelic have pushed on from last season on this showing and now Hibs must regroup and start again. MOM to Tits for being our best player in possession. OPP MOM O'Reilly

• Derek Cahill GK
• Wilfried Lapierre DF
• Petesy O'Brien MD
• Stephen Moran --
• Seb Santoro --
• Brian O'Reilly --
• Shane Buttimer --
• Brett Bowman --
• James Devane --
• Dane Smith --
• Simon Lloyd --

• Conor King --
• Conor McHugh --
• Keith O'Leary --
• Mike Touchy Feeley --
• Ryan McEneaney --

A cunning workaround to temporarily appease our league overlords

The door opens quietly, it is 4am after all and we cannot make any noise, which could wake anyone in the house. But he is up early enough to catch his prey. 'Now I have got you' he mumbles to himself like a deranged sociopath, devoid of emotion, like a shark, single minded. Deadly. His weapon? A fine (or mulct), which as we all know is money that a court of law or other authority decides has to be paid as punishment for a crime or other offence. And the CosmoLeague love a fine. Oh yes. What is the crime in question today though which could incur such a penalty? A late match report of course. Chalky silently turns on his computer. Opens his outlook. Goes into his drafts. Scrolls down to find his pre-prepared e-mail fine notification addressed to the Gaelic Lions. 'Finally......' He opens the draft. His finger hovers over the send button. This $50 fine will be the sweetest of all!!! My best work so far!! MY FINEST WORK TO DATE!!!!!!' He has a quick check of the Cosmo website. 'Sorry, what? The notepad symbol is already green! Not black! Not even blue! GREEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!' NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! The Lions submitted this match report the day before it was even due at 3:45pm!!!!!!! 'NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'